The Circle of Trust


Hello everyone!  I pray that all is well with you and yours.  At this stage in my life, I have grown to realize that “well” does not mean perfect.  So, if you have some challenges, but were able wake up indoors with a meal …be grateful!

As I write this entry, I am reflecting over how my circle of friends has changed over the years.  In my younger days, I spent lots of time trying to determine what I did to people that are no longer in my life.  Guess what I know now…it’s ok!  I have tried to reach out and talk things over.  I cannot talk to my young self and dry her tears, but I can certainly speak to those going through it right now.

I believe it is honorable to try to get to the root of the problem and save a friendship, but sometimes the other party is unwilling to hear you.  I would suggest that you speak your piece, acknowledge their silence and move forward with your life.  If you wronged them, then sincerely apologize.  If you are confused by the tension, inquire about it and give them a chance to explain.  Surely, these actions cannot be one-sided for true healing.  Once again, if they act unbothered by your efforts…let them go!

It may hurt and upset you for a long time, but do not anguish over someone that did not bother to be honest with you.  Move forward with a clean heart.  Keep your ugly thoughts at slim to none.  We are human.  There will be other friends and this situation will help you have better relationships in the future, if you deal with it correctly.  Check your anger and release it.  It will only make you sick.

The same way that you age and evolve, so does your circle of trust.  Some people will be strong figures that genuinely care for you and will be with you always.  Others will be there simply for a season and if you take enough inventory you will discover why the friendship ran its course.  Be good to others and recognize when they aren’t being good to you.

     Don’t waste your time wishing them harm or trying to make them feel small.  Allow them to realize that they lose out by losing you!


Hey everyone!  Thanks for joining me again.  For the record, this will not be about makeup tips or fabulous finds.  Mascara is one of my favorite songs by the amazing Jazmine Sullivan.  I love music for more than the feeling and movement that songs evoke, but I live for lyrics!

This particular song is not very new, but I keep it in my playlist because I love the way it tells a story.  I think women should especially check it out because it points out some hard truths about our society.  Themes like competitiveness among women, living a gold digger lifestyle, and valuing one’s self with material things are all explored in this song.  It resonates with me.  It says more than the surface value of the words sung.

I love dressing up and getting cute.  I think makeup is fun and desiring the fine things in life is admirable.  So, what I am about to say is not to insult anyone that gets glamorous on a regular.

I want to be loved and adored when I “glow up” like Mary J. and when I am as fresh faced as a teenager.  I feel comfortable in both skins.  I am grateful that my husband says the same “I love you” when my eyebrows are unruly and I wear frumpy clothes as he did on our wedding day.


It is a blessing to have the freedom to dress and glamourize yourself as the mood rises.  For some people, they are in the mood 24/7 and I love it.  However, ladies of you are not financially or physically in the mood to keep up with celebrities that have glam squads, do not put undue pressure on yourself.  Take inventory on why you get cute.  I pray is it not a chore, forced activity, or security blanket for issues you THINK you see.  You are beautiful just the way you were made.  If you simply enjoy the freedom of changing your look, feel free!

Listen to Mascara and the album it is featured on, Reality Show By Jazmine Sullivan (2015).


Giving of Yourself

“I gave wrong people right pieces of me.”


5350445291_d49fe8dd67_bHave you ever felt like this quote fit your circumstance? I know I have.  In an instance, we can quickly attribute this to romantic love.  I can go on and on about how loving the wrong person romantically can have negative ramifications, but today I want to have a different discussion.

The one thing that seems continuous and constant is the concept of time, but each of us has a specific allotment of it.  It’s like having money in a bank account.  You can withdraw money to your heart’s content and spend every dime you have, but how would you spend it if your balance was a secret to you?

Your time can also be viewed the same way.  Our time is precious and we should be selective of how we use it and to whom we spend it with.  Otherwise, the feeling that you have wasted your time can settle in or you can miss a blessing that was supposed to be for you.  The old saying, “Time flies when you are having fun,” is true.  However, it also zooms past you when you are not making the best of it.

Whether you are clubbing when you should be studying or giving one-sided blessings to so-called friends, the thrill does not last long. You will look up to find that your grades are failing, your pockets are empty, your gas tank is on “E,” and there is no one around to reciprocate your kindness.  Am I saying to be selfish and not help others? Absolutely not.  I am not saying to only help people that are in a position to help you.  My belief is that we are here to help our fellow man, not just take from others.

We should be careful not to bankrupt ourselves financially or emotionally in anything that we do for others or ourselves. Be responsible with what God has given you in terms of time and resources.  Money comes and goes, but the time we are given here is not guaranteed or without end.

Wrong people prey on people without directions and goals.  They pounce on people without boundaries or self-worth. They can sense vulnerability.  Don’t be afraid to give of yourself, but give unto like minded people.  People that value and respect you and your time.


(If anyone knows who authored this statement please let me know in the comments)

Mommyhood 101: Nobody’s Perfect

1st time? Nervous? Overwhelmed? Scared to make a mistake? Remember, you may want to be perfect, but your baby does not expect perfection.  Your baby wants your best logical effort.  Do for your child within your means with lots and lots of love!  Keeping up with others will only leave you in debt and stressed. If you focus on love, creating memories, and your personal development… financial increase and a strong bond with your child will fall into place!

I believe in God, I urge you to stay positive and prayerful!

What’s Your Imprint?

I’m bacimprintk…My people! I hope that you have been truly living out the time you are given.  Life is precious.  If you have not realized how precious, just wait until someone that you love more than yourself has to leave this earth.  Some of you are ready to close this window and look for the latest Kardashian news, but I am just trying to be real.

For just a moment, think about how you want to be remembered.  Do you care about the photos in the program of your memorial service?  Do the memories people share on that day matter to you? 

I can answer all of those in one word, NO.  Surely, people who plan every detail are wonderful because it takes a lot of pressure away from the family, but what will you leave behind.  What imprint will you leave on those who knew you?

Perhaps you are thinking, “Imprint? This world is built on the premise that every man is for himself.”  Well,  I want to tell you that the life you lived while people could see, hear, touch, and interact with you should speak louder than any words that you or anyone could author in your obituary.  It is more that donating change to needy children in the supermarket or offering someone a ride.  While these actions are noteworthy and certainly bless someone, I want you to dig deeper.  It is more that spending time with friends and being kind and generous to people that you like.

Your imprint can be larger than the people you CHOOSE to be around.  It is larger than your children, greater than your lifelong friends and even deeper than being a devoted spouse.  Kindness toward people you love is easy, try being nice to people you do not know.  Invest in a young person that is not related to you because you have some extra time or money, not because you are asked.

There are so many kindnesses you can bestow on people from day to day, but keep in mind that your imprint is more that what you do.  It is your heart.  What parts of your heart do you leave on your timeline?  The judgmental pieces? X-Rated segments?  Some how our society has the idea that technology at your finger tips means freedom of speech at the expense of your dignity and heart.  Try your best to be the best version of you in the streets, at home, in church, at work and online!

None of us are perfect, but people that have nothing to say in person (negative or positive) often have no problem dragging someone on the internet for anything!  It really bothers me.  While I believe the internet is great place for discussion of any kind, some people have no tact.

What am I getting at?  Your voice speaks for you and tells your life story just as much as your actions.  There are three kinds of people in your friends lists:  genuine family/friends, people that pay attention to keep in touch, and internet trolls.

Do not let the trolls surprise you, they exist offline too.  People that text you just to see if you are having less fun than they are on holidays, those who have nothing positive to say about you and blame you for it, and folks that invite themselves out with you just to negatively tear your outing apart.

Live to give of your energy.  Live to ignite someone else positively.  Live to be remembered for being a blessing.



Relationship Ikea?

Welcome back folks! I am sure you may be puzzled at the titled of this post.  Well, this title and concept was presented by motivational speaker, poet, and author, Ace Metaphor.  Take some time to view his video.

Should we expect to “get what we pay for?”  After the initial bliss, should we consider a love interest with issues damaged goods? My belief is that we have some issue.  Whether your special love is a neat freak, Pig Pen, a former foster kid, reformed criminal, judgemental christian or serial hand washer, people have issues.

There is an endless array of content on love and relationships, but the decisions you make are yours. Be confident enough to stand up for your needs and wants.  Moreover, a part of what many look for in love his someone to help them through their issues.  The search for lifelong companionship is a whirlwind of emotions, but you have the power to decide what is a deal breaker and what is not!

So if you end up with a date that you feel you have to assemble like a brand new bookcase, figure out if the instructions are too complicated for you!


Couple Chaos: 5 Do’s and Don’ts for New Parents

heart-1647308_960_720So, you have a newborn baby! All of the pregnancy fuss is over, baby showers have passed, and the baby is here!  You look at your significant other moments after baby’s birth and imagine no greater feeling on earth.  Well, congratulations to you both!  There is no doubt the baby will bring sheer joy to both of you, but what if the bliss in your relationship comes to a screeching halt?

5 Spousal Do’s and Dont’s:

#1: Check on Mom. The woman you love just brought a child into the world. There may be aches, pains, and needs that she is ignoring for the sake of her newest priority, the baby.  Inquire with her several times a day.  Perhaps, you watch a television show with the baby and allow Mom a needed nap or shower.

#2: Check on Dad. Although the wife or girlfriend gives birth, your spouse is in need of your attention too.  With “baby on the brain,” it is easy to feel overwhelmed and like your spouse should understand you have a ton of things to do.  This is true, but whether they are on paternity leave or at work, show some affection and send loving texts while you are apart.  Make sure you muster enough energy to ask about their day when they arrive!

#3: Listen With A Smile.  You may be tired of hearing about the baby’s newest quirks or maybe you feel like your spouse does not ask about YOU anymore.  Whatever the topic, hear them out.  If you feel a little neglected, voice your opinion respectfully because it probably is not what you think.  Keep “baby envy” to a minimum Dads, your spouse’s life and perspective on it is forever changed.  Mothers need support and encouragement. If you give her what you want in return, I believe you will love the end result.

#4: Family Time is Quality Time. There must be time where you enjoy the blessing together. Try not to desert the primary caregiver by being gone too much.  I know the life you had before the baby seems far away, but the baby is only a baby once and will thrive from the love of the parents.  If you cannot get along, how is the tension affecting the baby? Spend time together and find special moments during baby’s naps.

#5: Romance Can Exist.  Be creative! Picnic in the living room, have a movie night, order takeout from your favorite restaurant… parenthood does not mean the couple cannot enjoy each other.  It means you nuture the baby together. Then, you find ways to make your spouse feel special.

It may not mean going on lots of trips and having loads of cocktails right away, but just learning to appreciate time at home.