Poetry Corner: The Side Door

I love poetry!  I think it is an interesting form of expression. One stanza can be interpreted several ways and still not hit the targeted meaning.  I rarely share my work, but feel free to read….

The Side Door

After dark and the day is done

Texting and giggling

Clinching the phone, all in flirt zone

Smiling and thinking

Should I stay or should I go?

 

He said he needs me

Hmm I wonder, what for?

Friends for a long time

Always have a good time

It might be fun to go?

 

The lady in me is trying to stay

The adventurous me wants to go play

Not tied down

No strings attached anywhere

So I say, YOLO.

 

Riding alone to my soundtrack of the night

Pull up at the front door

Looking left and right

Text him that “I made it.”

Wait for the signal to go

To my surprise…

He advised me to enter the side door.

 

The side door?

Ok, how cute and private?

It cuts out the walk of shame

Once inside I try to hide

The nervousness that came

A cup to relax

Another to suppress my logic

Half a glass more

my friend wants more

 

We end the night

Just as flirty as the start

Bedroom glances

Transferred lip gloss

And I head for the door

 

I jump in the car

Wave from afar

So Chill, yet so unsettled

My perspective became clear

 

Historically, sistas hated these doors

Entryways of slaves and underlings

Openings for sneakin’ and creepin’

A door for a secret

A SIDE CHICK ENTRANCE

No relationship in the stars

No family meetings in the cards

No need to call Miss Cleo.

 

This thing was a secret and nothing more

I filled the empty seat

Drank from the second glass

I was company and nothing more

I said to myself:

Don’t mistake it for more

Remember you entered the side door

Friends Forever Only

Because anything more would include:

Sunshine and special treatment

An Introduction to Moms

And a proud escort through the front door.

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Relationship Ikea?

Welcome back folks! I am sure you may be puzzled at the titled of this post.  Well, this title and concept was presented by motivational speaker, poet, and author, Ace Metaphor.  Take some time to view his video.

Should we expect to “get what we pay for?”  After the initial bliss, should we consider a love interest with issues damaged goods? My belief is that we have some issue.  Whether your special love is a neat freak, Pig Pen, a former foster kid, reformed criminal, judgemental christian or serial hand washer, people have issues.

There is an endless array of content on love and relationships, but the decisions you make are yours. Be confident enough to stand up for your needs and wants.  Moreover, a part of what many look for in love his someone to help them through their issues.  The search for lifelong companionship is a whirlwind of emotions, but you have the power to decide what is a deal breaker and what is not!

So if you end up with a date that you feel you have to assemble like a brand new bookcase, figure out if the instructions are too complicated for you!

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Couple Chaos: 5 Do’s and Don’ts for New Parents

heart-1647308_960_720So, you have a newborn baby! All of the pregnancy fuss is over, baby showers have passed, and the baby is here!  You look at your significant other moments after baby’s birth and imagine no greater feeling on earth.  Well, congratulations to you both!  There is no doubt the baby will bring sheer joy to both of you, but what if the bliss in your relationship comes to a screeching halt?

5 Spousal Do’s and Dont’s:

#1: Check on Mom. The woman you love just brought a child into the world. There may be aches, pains, and needs that she is ignoring for the sake of her newest priority, the baby.  Inquire with her several times a day.  Perhaps, you watch a television show with the baby and allow Mom a needed nap or shower.

#2: Check on Dad. Although the wife or girlfriend gives birth, your spouse is in need of your attention too.  With “baby on the brain,” it is easy to feel overwhelmed and like your spouse should understand you have a ton of things to do.  This is true, but whether they are on paternity leave or at work, show some affection and send loving texts while you are apart.  Make sure you muster enough energy to ask about their day when they arrive!

#3: Listen With A Smile.  You may be tired of hearing about the baby’s newest quirks or maybe you feel like your spouse does not ask about YOU anymore.  Whatever the topic, hear them out.  If you feel a little neglected, voice your opinion respectfully because it probably is not what you think.  Keep “baby envy” to a minimum Dads, your spouse’s life and perspective on it is forever changed.  Mothers need support and encouragement. If you give her what you want in return, I believe you will love the end result.

#4: Family Time is Quality Time. There must be time where you enjoy the blessing together. Try not to desert the primary caregiver by being gone too much.  I know the life you had before the baby seems far away, but the baby is only a baby once and will thrive from the love of the parents.  If you cannot get along, how is the tension affecting the baby? Spend time together and find special moments during baby’s naps.

#5: Romance Can Exist.  Be creative! Picnic in the living room, have a movie night, order takeout from your favorite restaurant… parenthood does not mean the couple cannot enjoy each other.  It means you nuture the baby together. Then, you find ways to make your spouse feel special.

It may not mean going on lots of trips and having loads of cocktails right away, but just learning to appreciate time at home.

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Does “Keeping a Man” exist?

Does RULES + ACTION = A KEPT MAN?

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There is an incessant amount of literature available to guide us through the ebb and flow of love and romance.  People long for true love, anecdotes, and old adages to tell them the ways a woman can keep her man.

I beg to differ. There is not a set of guidelines that tame the adventurous, calm the cheater, and implant your man permanently in your life.  There are certainly plenty of ways to show your love and demonstrate the strength of your feelings, but none of the possibilities guarantees you a faithful, lifelong soulmate.

People do not stay in relationships because the house is spotless, the food is 5-star, and their mate is “live from the red carpet” everyday.  Love saves relationships.  Until it is common knowledge that there is no image that secures fidelity, people will still feel betrayal after following all the “rules.”  For example, a woman with designer nails, immaculate hair, a flawless body, and perfect attention to the needs of her spouse is a feat that some are faced with everyday.  Consider this FAIR WARNING:  “While commendable, this does not keep a man.”

There is no key to matters of the heart, even those who love deeply can drift apart.  None of the rule books available in paperback, hardcover, or Kindle edition will solidify your place in love.  Trust in God, if you know him.  Live in love and lead with respect.  Be the best partner you can be and admit you need help or space when the love seems distant and strained.

Don’t get caught trying to perfect how God made you to keep your mate.  Your mate is responsible for their faithfulness to you.